Shades Of A 119
Remember everyone- Khaos livestream is tonight at 8! There won’t be a shades page Monday because I’ll be travelling back from Kitacon instead!
I was listening to Addicted to you while writing this page, it totally works.
Discord Comics
A collection of Queer LGBT* Comics by Tab Kimpton
Currently Updating
INFERNAL RELATIONS
Updates Monday
Faster updates & NSFW all on my patreon
Latest Comics
Archive
Buy from the Store
|
 |
Subscribe
For important news about kickstarters, comics and new stuff by TabFollow on Social Media
 |
 |
 |
I so very badly want this to end well.
JD seems like an okay person, but how in hell do they not realize that it would be awkward for their ex to see them having sexy times with other people? Honestly the majority of people do not want to see people they know doing the dirty. I know plenty of kinksters and while we will gladly watch scenes with other people, seeing each other is just kinda awkward most of the time D:
JD probably did. However, did JD invite Anwar to the club to watch? No, they did not. Anwar made the choice to come, and Anwar made the choice to look when Chris *specifically* told him not to. I wonder if Chris might’ve even been uncomfortable with Anwar coming because he might’ve known that JD would be there as well…
I don’t know, maybe it’s just me, but when someone tells me not to look it’s like they forcefully implanted magnets into my eyes that force me to see what I’m not supposed to be saying.
Seeing* oops
Not just you. I’d have a knee-jerk reaction that I couldn’t control to look exactly at what I was told not to look at.
Yeah, that’s pretty much human nature. I think Chris was just trying to warn Anwar to keep his shock to a minimum, rather than prevent him from seeing it.
I think JD realizes that. That was why they were originally were apologetic about Anwar seeing their scene, even though it wasn’t their fault. They’re just angry about the phrase “weird stuff”.
No.
They got angry BEFORE that phrase. Also, if you look at the comic that depicts that night, JD is clearly equally uncomfortable (at least at first) but is putting all of that on Anwar in this discussion, as if it was only Anwar who had a problem. In fact, Anwar happily walked up to JD that night (before seeing the sub), and continued to talk with them after the sub came ’round (until Chris had finished changing).
Not to mention that Anwar without blame said “so I think I won’t be coming to the club anymore.”
JD probably felt uncomfortable before the sub came around because they -knew- what was in store for that evening, and that Anwar would probably have issues with it.
Anwar has basically bungled up communication this entire time, so I’m not surprised JD has continued to jump from one reason to another as to why Anwar’s upset.
Could be that they think Anwar being asexual isn’t bothered by seeing or even knowing people he cares about are having sex with other people. While it’d be pretty clear with Anwar’s hang ups around sex that it’d most likely touch on his insecurities, my experiences with asexsual people who aren’t grossed out by sex is that other people having sex around them doesn’t impact them at all. It could also be that they don’t look at the BDSM/kink stuff as sex. While my sex life and my BDSM life often overlap, they also often don’t. I know many kinksters who rarely mix BDSM and sex. It could also be that they don’t know where Anwar’s boundaries are because Anwar in only just getting to a point where he realizes he not only needs to figure out him own boundaries but that he also needs to set them for others. It could be any combination of those or something else. There’re lots of possible reasons.
I’m ace and vaguely kinky (I’ve decided not to enter the lifestyle because I’m a dangerous sub…something I learned the hard way. *wince*) Sex itself doesn’t bother me. I actually aced Health class (Ooh. Bad pun). I just don’t want it.
Sex for me is generally a “yup, it happens, and that’s okay, but I’d really prefer if it happened away from me.”
That having been said, I am *not* comfortable seeing people I’ve been romantically involved with/had a crush on in sexualized situations (something else I learned the hard way). I wouldn’t say anything because it’s not my place, especially if I were in a kinky club, and I have a better poker face than Anwar, but I would be *exceedingly* uncomfortable.
Um, hello, and please tell me to shove this somewhere unpleasant if I say something that is way out of line.
I have never encountered the term “dangerous sub” before. What does that mean, by your definition? I am most definitely NOT asking you to describe the situation in which you found that out about yourself if you’re not comfortable sharing that information, but I am curious as to what the term means.
Oh no. I’m totally fine with explaining. That’s my own word. I’ve never met anyone else who uses it, but I sometimes forget that.
It’s a term I use to describe the fact that I am dangerous to myself and and Dom/me I would play with because I get non-communicative when I’m in a scene, and that’s really *not* what you want to do. It’s something I’ve tried to break myself out of, but I haven’t been able to manage it. Part of it was my inexperience at the time, but part of it is also that I just…blank.
I hate that I do it, and it means I’ve got a chronic itch I can’t scratch, but for my safety and for the safety of my play partner, I’ve just got to stay out of it.
Well at least Anwar is actually listening to the words coming out of his own mouth and realizing how bad it sounds. Glad that he is being actually considerate to someone he claims as friend. Yes he has a right to his personal opinions, but other people have a right not to be verbally backhanded as well.
I’m not defending Anwar per se, but I think he’s more of a terrible communicator than a bad person.
I didn’t say he was a bad person, only that he was bad at communicating his thoughts/needs to people he is close to. I am glad to see him achieving some self-awareness here, I know several people who are brusque and rude without meaning to be and they are always surprised when I point out to them how something they said could be taken wrong.
When I saw the first panel I was about to go “NOOOOO” and was so relieved that he actually caught himself.
Dude. JD interrupted Anwar before he had a chance to talk now TWICE in this conversation alone, and Anwar’s the only one bad at communication?
For some reason I really enjoy that last panel of J’s face. So heartfelt and so surprised at the same time.
Cannot wait for the next page.
See also: HOT.
I agree. So full of emotion, and so easy to see what it is. Very well drawn.
Can I tell you how PERFECT that song was? Not for even the song itself, but for the very fact that Corbin Bernsen plays the cop at then end~
His long running show, Psych, ended yesterday, and I’ve been bumming pretty hard over it. Of course it would take a couple of gun-toting lesbians and a suitcase bomb to raise my spirits XD;;;
Man oooh man :)
Hell knows no fury… like a lady who had there lady offed
I really like this. They are both trying to explain how they feel. Anwar is being honest and direct (and realizing when he’s phrasing things wrong) and while JD is on the defensive at first their face in that last panel shows they are listening. Communication like this can be awkward, but also really important.
Oof, JD’s face. This conversation won’t end well.
Right. In. The. Feels. Ouchies.
This.
I’ve left off commenting for a bit because folk seem a little tense, but hopefully I won’t call down fire and brimstone by simply saying; Both Anwar and JD need to do some serious talking.
Carefully.
Considerately.
…then again, that’s a far less interesting story.
Right? They’ve both been royal fuckups when it comes to each other, but who wants to read a story about perfect people who always do what they should? And who would bother to write it?
You’d be surprised how many people do write that sort of thing. o.O
You’re right though; it’s no fun to read at all.
Well, fair enough. What I mean is what worthwhile writer would write such a thing.
The comments on Khaos sometimes, holy shit. “Character did a BAD THING because they are BAD. They’re a BAD PERSON.” Not so much “Character made a mistake, probably out of sheer terror, because they are a child and just figuring this stuff out, and whoa this is so realistic I can hardly stand it.” I had to stop reading them.
I agree 100%, but I wish people would stop hating on one character or the other. Yes, they’re both fucking up, but they’re both ultimately good people who deserve to be happy.
At least it’s just the characters and now fellow commentors.
The internet is such a bizarre place, but Tab is really fortunate in that his readers, followers and regular comment folk aren’t as crazy as some of the ones I do read.
:)
Very true. Though I’ve seen it get a little grumpy here, too. It’s kind of sad because my two little sane areas of the internet (here and one other place) both went kind of pear-shaped the same week, which was kind of new for me, and it meant I didn’t really feel like I had a safe place to be.
All the feels, ouch. Much ouch.
On a lighter note, though. Does JD do the super-close shaved head thing, or is it more of the past-stubble-into-lovely-each-fuzz thing? I love that super soft fuzzy length before it gets long enough to really style. It’s fun to run your hand over it ^.^
Also, if JD decides to change their hair color, I would vote for either a semi-dark royal purple, or neon blue. JD would totally rock either shade!
\o/ Yay! I was wondering about Anwar continuing to avoid this discussion. So good to see him force through and get it started.
There you go Anwar! And good job catching yourself and restating what you actually meant. It’s a tough discussion to have, but I feel like this shows he’s slowly but surely getting better with his communication. It’s probably gonna suck, but I feel it’s always better to get some things out into the open then to keep letting them fester inside you. And this conversation just seems so much healthier than how the break up talk went.
Communication is exactly what I think he needs to work on. JD too, actually. It’s good to see the both of them learning to communicate better with each other. Not sure if it’ll fix things for their friendship, but I think it’ll help them grow as people.
I’m just loving all the expressions here, and I love how this conversation is going and just hearts. Hearts everywhere.
JD’s reaction makes me think they didn’t realize Anwar hadn’t yet gotten over their romantic relationship/break up. JD probably took Anwar’s relationship with Chris as proof he had moved on. Not sure of the time lapse between the break up and Anwar/Chris, but it seems like a year or more to me.
Yeah, based on that reaction I’d say JD had no idea Anwar still had feelings for them (if they even infer that yet from this conversation). I am still a bit surprised JD wouldn’t realize, just in general, that someone they used to be in a relationship with (even if they were over JD) wouldn’t want to see JD do scenes with other people. But maybe JD just wouldn’t feel that way, so they don’t think about the fact that many others would? It does seem pretty clear that JD had no idea Anwar hadn’t exactly “moved on,” despite being with Chris currently.
This may help JD better understand past conversations where Anwar expressed not wanting to know details about their dom/sub relationship. I think JD has been thinking Anwar is being sex negative or expressing distaste in what they enjoy, when really Anwar is mainly uncomfortable with things involving JD and had no idea how to voice that. I’d say that after getting this out in the open, their relationship will likely improve. But honestly, I think it could go either way. Finding out a friend (still) has feelings for you (again, if that can be inferred or is later stated) can make things really awkward.
I am very glad they are going to have this conversation. It was clear in the conversation at the club that JD didn’t realize that Anwar was *sad* about the fact they weren’t still in that close/intimate relationship they had before (when Anwar said “this is almost like before” and then JD brushes it off with “no prob, we’re different people”). So yay for having that conversation.
I don’t think they should get together now, though I admit to some desire to see Anwar get to have both Chris AND JD, (and JD get to have Anwar AND their kinky subby sluts). I know, I’m just an incurable romantic.