Shades Of A 031
Simple page is simple, but sometime you need to do simple pages to give the right pacing.
During this scene in 50SOG they awkwardly say good bye, have some kind of non-fight and then Ana goes and cries on the floor for a while because of reasons.
‘Unbidden and unwelcome tears pool in my eyes. Why am I crying? I sink to the ground, angry at myself for this senseless reaction. Drawing up my knees, I fold in on myself. I want to make myself as small as possible. Perhaps this nonsensical pain will be smaller the smaller I am. Placing my head on my knees, I let the irrational tears fall unrestrained. I am crying over the loss of something I never had. How ridiculous. Mourning something that never was – my dashed hopes, dashed dreams, and my soured expectations.’
Hm. So what is “what I wanted him to do” implying?
it finishes a sentence from last installment — he has no idea what he wants chris to do.
Hmmm, so does he mean do this again, as in go on a date with Chris? Or as in get involved with someone again implying that there is a someone in the past and that it was not a positive experience for him?
Or it could be that he just doesn’t want to get romantically/sexually involved period, because it always ends the same awkward way. Being ace myself I can understand the frustration. I only ever want to be friends and while I can’t stop guys from liking me without being a complete asshole all the time, it’s very frustrating to have to explain that I can’t have that kind of relationship, and I always get blamed for “leading them on”, even though all I did was be friendly. T_T
Actually, I believe Tab has said that he’s not aromantic. Just asexual. So it’s not a “I don’t want to get romantically involved with anyone ever” thing, unless that’s a conscious reaction based on past experiences.
My guess is just that he’s confused as hell, but time will show us where this is going.
Well given that most relationships naturally progress from romantic to sexual, that would still be a problem for him. He may like Chris, but knowing he can only take the relationship so far puts a damper on the whole thing.
Had to read the 50SOG quote about twelve times to figure out what, “Perhaps this nonsensical pain will be smaller the smaller I am” meant. Bad writing is bad. (Also, am I the only one who imagines every excerpt read in a simpering voice?)
You should check out the audiobook on audible.com. The poor voice actor sounds like she’s trying so hard to make the book sound even remotely readable, but it comes off as her sounding like she’s mentally handicapped. Usually the author’s words can give some sort of “stage direction” for the voice actor, but James is such a horrible writer that the poor actor is left with nothing.
I couldn’t even make it through one page of the audiobook. It was JUST THAT BAD.
Jesus. I managed to get through a minute of the sample. I feel like I need to go scrub adjectives off my skin.
I took it as meaning he doesn’t feel he can be in a relationship with an allosexual person because it ended badly before. I thought perhaps this was referring to his past involvement with JD. I don’t know, just speculating.
I took it as meaning he can’t go on a date with Chris again, ’cause he liked it to much and it’s freaking him out.
I picked up a similar meant to Phyllida, that he’s talking more about the whole advancing into a relationship thing. Whether the again refers to the briefly-hinted-at fiasco with JD or some other isn’t clear. I would imagine for someone asexual who is comfortable with romance, cuddling, kissing, and so on … it would be very difficult to approach any potential relationship with someone who is not asexual and might want more (even if not immediately).
er, meaning — not meant
“Some kind of non-fight”…? I am curious. You know, in a horrific way, curious of something I know I should not be curious about.
Thanks, but… that’s not really what I intended with the question.
And this was supposed to be a reply to DRV. Sigh. Sorry.
In any case, Phyllidia and Johndar seem to have gotten what I meant with the question – like, where is this leading? What is Anwar thinking? I’m just really looking forward to seeing how Tab explores asexuality.
uhm… has it been mentioned if chris is gay or straight? and am i being wholly ignorant in asking if anwar is a gay or straight asexual?
Most asexuals don’t have a preference either way. Sex itself is undesirable, and that’s the avenue that impacts gender. Kisses and cuddles etc (which are usually as far as asexuals go for their own benefit) are generally the same regardless of which gender you’re having them with.
At least that’s how it works with me. I’m in a heterosexual marriage because the person I fell in love with happens to be male. It could have just as easily been a homosexual relationship.
I have to disagree with “that’s the avenue that impacts gender.” Attraction is greater than how two people might manage to have sex with one another, if they even choose to do so. While I’d guess that romantic asexuals might commonly have a less intense preference for a specific gender than a sexual person might, that preference is still present for many.
I apologize if this post comes off as too forceful or something – asexuality is your experience, not mine, I’m only extrapolating from my second-hand experiences with romantic asexual friends and a significant other who are only interested in a specific gender themselves. I just mean to say, gender preferences are still common for many romantic asexual people.
You’re not too forceful at all. Gender is something that can have a big impact on a romantic relationship, because I would argue that some personality traits are pretty consistent across genders, at least as far as the general population is concerned. I myself, a demisexual, could never see being in a romantic relationship with most guys, just because of their general personalities. If anything, I’m transromantic, which makes it hard for me to be in a “gay or straight” relationship, especially since I’m a little genderqueer myself. Homo- and Hetero- romanticism are real things that definitely impact relationships. Saying otherwise is kind of invalidating to sexual people, because it’s implying that their reason for liking a certain gender is only to do with sex, which is denying the reality that they can have romantic (or aromantic) feelings as well. Everyone has a romantic preference, not just asexuals.
thanks!