What should go on the ALL THE THINGS T-shirt?
It’s the 1st of June and already the ALL THE THINGS t-shirt is winning the poll- if you want the Asexuals are Ace shirt to win keep voting! XD
We’ve talked a bit about what should go on the final versions of the shirt, and I’d once again like your input! Vote for as many different things as you like. Some of the options are on what versions of similar words to use, some of it is random crap that you might not even want. Begin the cull!
Shouldn’t there perhaps be transsexual too?
I’ve avoided that one as it has very different meanings country to country. In the UK it ‘officially’ means someone who is medically transitioning, something many people disagree with.
asterisk… what?
I believe the asterisk in trans* makes it transgender, transsexual, transvestite, etc. I think more people use it, especially non-binary gendered trans* people :)
What about ‘Khaos Kreature’?
Note 1: Not only should “Other” be on the shirt, it should be in larger print than everything else. ;-)
Note 2: If “Kinky” or “Perverted” make the cut, I vote for a “Vanilla” option, to keep things well-rounded.
Note 3: Why offer up Butch/Femme as options but not Top/Bottom?
Arrg stop it with your brilliant ideas. This t-shirt can only hold so much >.< (Though I wouldn't say butch/femme and top/bottom are similar- femme tops and butch bottoms totally exist)
I’ve never been sure about “Straight” myself as it seems to suggest others have something wrong with them (they’re bent, wonky in some way). I usually try to refer to myself as “het” or “hetero”. Thoughs?
I used to wonder the same thing, but someone explained it to me like pipes, once. you have straight pipes and you have not-straight pipes. Just because they’re different doesn’t make either one less useful, just for different things. It’s not a perfect analogy, but it made sense when I was 14. ^^’
I dunno. I’m probably going to get flamed to hell for this, but I don’t think sub/dom belongs on the shirt. I feel like telling someone your kink is different than telling someone you’re gay or trans. Not trying to put anyone down at all, I’ve just never understood why so many people feel like it’s necessary to let other people know what kind of sex they like. I never hear anything about sub/dom rights, or anything like that, so what’s the urge to tell everyone? Same thing with demisexual. My understanding is that it’s someone who is only sexually attracted to someone they are basically in love with. Can anyone explain why the word even exists? Because my friends who like to have sex regardless of emotional investment in the other person have never said “Hey, I’m a different sexuality than you because I like one-night stands.”
So you have high standards regarding who you’ll sleep with, cool. I don’t agree that it is a kind of sexuality on par with something like hetero/homo/bisexuality, or even asexuality! I just don’t get it.
Anyway, I’m sorry if anyone was offended, I just don’t understand why some of those choices are up there, since they don’t (in my mind) match the other options. I feel like sub/dom options, the furry option, and a couple more make it too much about sex and less about being a person. I feel like letting people know I’m a queer, trans*questioning person is very thoughtful regarding other people. I feel like telling people I’m a kinky, dom, demisexual furry is kind of too much information. I guess it just bothers me to see those things listed right next to lesbian/gay/genderfluid/trans* categories because a lot of media still portrays these people as perverts, and the “heathenous” kind, not the kinky fun kind. ;)
Demi is a useful word because demi people generally have no attraction without deep emotional connection. What you described sounds more like some level of monogamy. Demi isn’t synonymous with high standards. It’s also sometimes associated with the ace spectrum – there’s just no attraction or sexual desire for anyone other than someone to whom you are very close. You could compare the way attraction works for a demi to that of an asexual, except demis are often still sexual. It’s not a standards thing, it’s a difference in how attraction actually works.
I don’t really identify as anything, but demi is the closest approximation I’ve ever found for explaining how attraction works (or doesn’t work) for me. I don’t see it as an identity (for me), I just see it as a word that can more succinctly explain things. Asexuality is difficult to explain to people, and so is lack of attraction. That’s all. For that matter (from what I can tell, not trying to make assumptions), demis don’t deal with the discrimination and strife that most *asexual (bi-, ace-, homo-, etc) get. The closest thing I get to discrimination would be all the bewildered, “but he’s so hot, how do you not see it?” sort of statements that I’m sure ace people hear all the time. Hahah.
That said, I kind of agree about some of the dom/sub/furry/etc labels. They feel a bit out of place to me compared to the other labels, but if people want them and there’s room, then I support that.
Perhaps I should just say, it’s simply an intermediate between sexuality and asexuality in general. “Grey-A” is another term that would include both ace and demi, I suppose.
I also just now noticed that I screwed up the *sexual (bi-, homo-, a-, etc) and instead wrote *asexual. Oy. Hopefully everyone got what I meant.
People have been jailed and have lost child custody due to their behaviour in the bedroom (google “spanner trial” or see the book Sadomasochism: Powerful Pleasures for more on this). That makes it quite an important issue. Some people find not being able to be honest about what can sometimes feel to be a very important part of their lives due to fear of stigmatisation to be extremely oppressive.
Oh my god this. It’s not come up in the comic yet, but Chris is very scared of being outed, especially in the workplace for fear of losing his job.
Just wanted to thank N and Skiffle for patiently helping me understand some of these things a little better.
Who are the six people voting for female but not male?!
I was a little surprised to see Dom/sub but not see switch.
Yes, please, if you decided to include dom/sub can you also have switch? I guess one way to convey it would be to mark both dom and sub, but it’s not really the same, y’know?
I didn’t vote for “male” or “female” but I would vote for “man” or “woman.” Also I agree with vanilla being added.
oop, I’d vote for “man” AND “woman”
What, we don’t get romantic orientations as an option? I’d have to put down just “queer” and asexual or something? And what about man/woman (like TheDeviantE mentioned)? Seems kinda hypocritical to exclude cisgender people. (Male/female is not gender, guys, it’s biological sex.)
I want a ‘whatever’ option. x3
Um… does the word “creature” as featured on this list have any specific link or connotation with an identity or similar concept? Because it (along with “monster” in a highly reclamation/recontextualisation sort of a way) are very very strongly meaningful names for me and I was wondering if I was missing something.